July 13, 2010

Oh the Joys of Home Ownership

Yesterday, my upstairs toilet backed up.

So I did what any self-respecting owner would do: I called my roommate and asked him if he had been having trouble with the toilet. Perhaps he threw a condom in there? Or his girlfriend tried to flush down a tampon? Alas, I had only myself to blame for it.

Steps for Unsuccessfully Clearing a Toilet Bowl:

1 - So imagine if you will, me trying to flush the toilet, but the water coming perilously close to the edge of the bowl.

2 - Run downstairs to get a bucket and a plastic container to scoop out the water progressively and dump it in the downstairs bathroom. Repeat 5 times trying not to leave droplets on the floor. While you are visualising the scene, please keep this in mind: the bowl is not, err hum, clear (if you know what I mean).

3- Thoroughly disinfect bowl, bucket, container, hands and nails, floor and anything you may have come in contact with, or breathed on.

4 - Take a long shower to ensure extra cleanliness.

5 - Go on the internet and search for astute and innovative ways to clear clogs.

6- Try the dishwashing liquid and hot water trick.

7 - Wake up the next day to note with satisfaction that the liquid has spontaneously dropped back down.

8 - Flush toilet and note with disappointement that the toilet is indeed still clogged.

9 - Call roommate again. Finally capitulate to plunging the toilet.

So I'll let you know how that goes tomorrow, when said roommie brings home a new plunger. He has heroically stated that he will stay in the doorway (within hearing distance of the toilet, but not within seeing distance) to encourage me while I plunge away.

I am thinking about reselling already. Anybody interested?



1 comment:

Victoria said...

Kind of reminds me of this:

http://tireddad2.blogspot.com/2010/06/i-have-piss-in-my-bathroom-sink.html